Peter J. Jessen

"Goals Per Action" Success Consultant · · 9931 SW 61st Ave., Portland, OR 97219 · Tel: 503.977.3240 · Fax: 503.977.3239

Classes Based on Stephen Covey's, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Two class series — one for adults and one for teens — based on Stephen Covey and Sean Covey's books


Pages 27-69, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families:  Building a Beautiful Family Culture in a Turbulent World, Stephen R. Covey, Golden Books, New York, NY, 1997
Pages 47-72, THE 7 HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE TEEN: THE ULTIMATE TEENAGE SUCCESS GUIDE, Sean Covey, A Fireside Book, Simon & Schuste, 1998
Pages 14, 47, The 7 Habits of Effective Teens: THE MINIATURE EDITION, Sean Covey, 2002

The 7 BAD Habits of Highly DEFECTIVE Teans
: pp. 14-20
      • Bad Habit 1:  React
      • Bad Habit 2:  Begin with Ho End inb Mind       
      • Bad Habit 3:  Put First Thing First     
      • Bad Habit 4:  Think Win-Lose
      • Bad Habit 5:  Seek to Talk First, Then Pretend to Listen     
      • Bad Habit 6:  Don't Cooperate
      • Bad Habit 7:  Wear Yourself Out

       •  “Becoming an Agent of change in Your Family”
           (“Inside out approach”)

       •  “Habit #1:  Be Proactive:  be responsible, not emotionally reactive

       •  Habit #1:  the most fundamental decision of all”

       •  Key question for Habit 1:  “Are my actions based upon self-chosen values or upon my moods, feelings, and circumstances?”

         Between stimulus and response, there is a space.
In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response.  In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

Creating a “Pause Button”

       •  A defense against being reactive

       •  “If only I had stopped to think!”

       •  Pause button enables us to stop between what happens to us and our response to it, and to choose our own response.

       •  Self activate; activated by others

       •  Smile  -  breath  -  recall “don’t break role”

Four Unique Human Gifts

       •  Self-awareness:  stand apart from life and observe it

       •  Conscience:  evaluate what you are observing

       •  Creative Imagination:  envision different, positive

       •  Independent will:  the power to take action
           (“think outside the box” of unfounded “assumptions”)

       •  A 5th:  a sense of humor.  emerges from blending of
           other 4:  telling jokes, seeing the “funny” side of life; poking holes at stuffed shirts; having fun together.

Evaluate Level of Reactiveness

     •  Identify a problem

     •  Describe in REactive terms

     •  Focus on Circle of Concern

     •  CHANGE:  describe in PROactive terms

     •  Focus on your response-ability

     •  What is the difference between these two?

     •  Which resembles your and your family’s normal habit pattern when talking about family problems?

     •  "Emotional Bank Account:  Deposits and Withdrawals"
              •  Love is a verb
              •  Keys to maintaining a positive balance
                       •  Be kind
                       •  Apologize
                       •  Be loyal to those not present
                       •  Make and keep promises
                       •  Forgive

       •  Examples
              •  Withdrawals vs. deposits
              •  A Day’s Input to a Teen

       •  “The Primary Laws of Love:  acceptance, understanding, participation.”  p. 61

       •  “The Primary Laws of Life:  honesty, responsibility, integrity, service.”  p. 61

       •  Every problem = opportunity to make a deposit

       •  Remember the Chinese Bamboo tree

       •  Habit #1:  the key to all the other habits:  power to choose

       •  Habit #2:  next week:  how the transformation takes place, how the proactive muscle is developed.